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Under Great White Northern Lights

It's 1:34 am as I write this sentence. The White Stripes newest CD "Under Great White Northern Lights" came out 1 hour and 34 minutes ago and as of this moment I am halfway through it. Being the huge White Stripes fan that I am (they are my favorite band after all) I can say that it is every bit as good as I had anticipated. The energy put out by Jack can be felt immediately and it doesn't let up. I keep finding myself mouthing the words and bobbing my head during pretty much every song, which isn't odd for me when I listen to WS, however it is odd being that it's the first time I'm experiencing the CD and usually I like to take it in. Not this time though. It's too damn good.

All of their classic songs are here and Jack puts his unique style on each one, making it different from any other recording available for them. His improv is great to listen to and makes it the overall experience that much better. Every song has so much raw passion that it's hard to not be completely absorbed when listening.

I purchased this on iTunes so I haven't had the joy of seeing the dvd yet but I can only imagine how good it is. I'm hoping to make the leap at some point and pick it up on Blu Ray. I'd highly recommend it to any WS fan or just fan of music in general. This finds itself next to "Nirvana Live at Reading" as one of my favorite Live CD's of all time. Now I just hope this alludes to a WS CD with new material and a tour. Then I'll be an even happier camper!

Also, I finished the CD while writing this review.

Favorite films of 09...

Rather than write a massive post describing why for each of these choices, I'm just going to put the list there and let it speak for itself.

Best
  1. 1. Avatar

    2. District 9

    3. Inglourious Basterds

    4. 500 Days of Summer

    5. Fantastic Mr. Fox

    6. Up In The Air

    7. The Hurt Locker

    8. A Serious Man

    9. Up

    10. Invictus

    11. Trick R Treat

    12. Zombieland

    13. I Love You, Man

    14. Star Trek

    15. The Hangover

    16. Carriers

    17. World’s Greatest Dad

    18. Funny People

    19. Terminator: Salvation

    20. Adventureland

    21. Crazy Heart

    22. Where the Wild Things Are

    23. An Education

    24. The Men Who Stare At Goats

    25. Saw VI


    Worst:

    1. Halloween 2

    2. I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell

    3. Drag Me To Hell

    4. Transformers 2

    5. Sherlock Holmes

    6. Watchmen

    7. Sorority Row

    Best Performance by an Actor

    · Christoph Waltz – Inglourious Basterds

    · Sam Worthington – Avatar

    · George Clooney – Up in the Air/Fantastic Mr Fox

    · Joseph Gordon Levitt – 500 Days of Summer

    · Brad Pitt – Inglourious Basterds

    · Chris Pine – Star Trek/Carriers

    · Sharlto Copely – District 9

    · Matt Damon – Invictus

    · Morgan Freeman – Invictus

    Best Performance by an Actress

    · Zoe Saldana – Avatar

    · Anna Kendrick – Up in the Air

    · Carey Mulligan – An Education

    · Vera Farmiga – Up In the Air

    Biggest Surprises

    · Avatar

    · District 9

    · Fantastic Mr Fox

    · Trick R Treat

    · Saw VI

    · Carriers

    Biggest Disappointments

    · The Lovely Bones

    · Where The Wild Things Are

    · Sherlock Holmes

    · Drag Me To Hell

Bout to get gay with some Rasslin

Okay so I'm letting the cat out of the bag: Yes, I watch wrestling. Yes, that stupid stuff you flip through and go "So stupid" then promptly switch back to reality TV. I used to watch it when I was younger (during the "Attitude Era") and loved it then. Of course, back then I thought it was real and had no idea this was all just "entertainment". I, like many others, thought that it was real. Of course, if I were to just use common sense I would have realized that there's no way it could be real. The way that finishers can in some instances knock people out for minutes, and then other times it'll just take them out for a few seconds. Oh how naive I was.

Onto my main point, few months back (October I believe) I started watching the WWE again. Also, it's very odd to say that since I was so used to the WWF. Anyway, back to the point, I started watching this again mainly due to the fact that I watched some youtube videos for Jeff Hardy (one of my favorite wrestlers). After I had watched pretty much all I could on him I moved onto some other favorites such as Stone Cold Steve Austin, The Undertaker, HBK, and Bret 'The Hitman' Hart. I believe that one weekend while my roommate was gone I watched about 20 hours worth of wrestling related video. I even read the wikipedia pages, finding out what has happened over the years. That was it, I was hooked. I made a decision I never thought I would make again: I will watch current WWE events.

At this point, I figured I'd just watch an episode, see how bad it is nowadays, then move on. Only I saw that many of my favorites were still around (HBK, Taker, HHH) and that some of the Wrestler's I wasn't so familiar with (Morrison, Mysterio, Bourne) were pretty great high fliers. I had seen some little snippets of the current "Main Eventers" previous to coming back to it (Cena, Orton, Batista) but didn't know much about them. So over the next few weeks I was able to catch up on everything that was going on, who's who and so on. Oddly enough...I liked it. The stupid storylines were still there (anything Diva related) but some was pretty good (Batista vs. Mysterio). It all just works for what it is: entertainment.

Watching wrestling now and watching wrestling back 15 years ago, for me at least, are two very different experiences. The main difference being that I used to believe that this was all real. Obviously that makes the whole experience completely different. Instead of going into a match thinking "Oh I like him better, I hope he wins!" I go "Well they'll let him win so that this will set up perfectly for the PPV" or something to that liking. It's also pretty funny to notice all the overacting that goes on whether it's them trying to sell a finisher or just during one of their promo's. This brings me to something else: one little technical difference between the two eras, again for me, is all the terms. Stuff such as Promo's, Kayfabe, Face, and Heel meant absolutely nothing to me nowadays. I knew about two things: wrestling and the stuff that caused them to wrestle.

Rather than making this a separate post I'll just throw this in here since it's all related. One thing I noticed was that I quite enjoyed many of the wrestler's around nowadays so I figured I'd throw around some of my opinions on them.

Randy Orton - Probably my favorite out of all the "Main Eventers" and definitely one of my favorites on the entire roster. His storylines aren't very layered but he makes for a great heel (even though the crowd loves him). His finisher is pretty cool and he always seems like a huge threat whenever he's out there. The veracity of his moves make him intriguing. Wasn't a huge fan of all this Legacy bullshit going on. Can't believe that's been going on for so long. Glad to see them leaving that behind. Also, his entrance music is awesome and I always have it stuck in my head.

John Cena - Arguably the most popular of all current wrestlers, I can definitely see why. Cena has a charisma that is not matched by any other current wrestler. His promo's are the best out there usually and he stirs up a crowd like no other. Everyone seems much more involved in the match when he's around. His finisher's somewhat lacking. The Attitude Adjustment is definitely his best because it packs the most punch. The 'Five Knuckle Shuffle' is about as lame as the 'People's Elbow', especially since you can see it doesn't even connect to the person half the time, but the "You can't see me!" taunt that always precedes it is quite entertaining and the crowd really gets into it. Another person whose music is pretty kickass.

John Morrison - This is one that I didn't even realize until the Elimination Chamber, which as of this post was about 1 week ago. The only person I can compare him to is early Shawn Michaels. His look definitely resembles that and his high flying capabilities definitely impress. Starship Pain (terrible name, I know) is actually a very cool move that I always enjoy seeing just because it's something I don't think I could ever replicate. I just wish he would drop the fur coat look and make himself look like more of a badass and less of an 80's rockstar.

Chris Jericho - Now this is one that I like more for the man himself and not the character. He appears on several VH1 shows (ie. I Love the 80's) and he is definitely one awesome dude. So that tends to carry into my liking for him in the WWE. He makes for one great heel and does some pretty entertaining promos. Every time "Break the Wall down!" I immediately perk up and know something cool will happen. Some people may not like the Codebreaker, but I enjoy it. Simple yet effective. I remember Walls of Jericho from back when so that's some nice familiarity.

CM Punk - My opinion of Punk started when I found out that Jeff Hardy was no longer affiliated with the WWE and it was Punk who beat him in a career ending match. With Hardy being my favorite Wrestler, I obviously wasn't a fan of him upon finding out that information (though yes, it is all apart of the storyline and Hardy just wanted to leave). But he definitely grew on me. He makes for one fantastic heel. His "Straight Edge" gimmick is the best one out there and always makes for an intriguing watch. His finisher's aren't very memorable, with the "Go To Sleep" looking rather tame compared to most finishers that put the opponent in such a compromising position. Also has pretty damn good entrance music.

Edge - Back when I watched, Edge was teamed up with Christian and they always were feuding with either the Hardy's or the Dudley's, so to see him as a "Main Eventer" is kind of odd for me. It's unfortunate the others haven't achieved the success he has (outside of Jeff Hardy who quite obviously surpasses him). His promo's are some of the best out there and it seems like he's just having a good time which helps to connect with him. His "insane" look is just about as entertaining as it gets.

Kofi Kingston - Not very popular yet but I have a feeling he'll be getting bigger and bigger. His feud with Orton gave him plenty of publicity so hopefully he starts appearing in bigger events. He just has a style that I enjoy quite a bit. He doesn't really have much of a gimmick outside of being himself. He has some great high flying moves as well. Trouble in Paradise isn't quite as cool as some other finishers, but it gets the job done.

I'm not going to take the time to name some of the old wrestlers still around and give them their individual spotlight but Undertaker and HBK are looking old. They need to retire and let the new guys get some attention and vie for the Championships.

Now, people can look down on me all they want for it but I still really enjoy wrestling. Hell, even my dad refuses to admit that I watch it. He's extremely embarrassed by it but what do I care? At least I like it so what does it matter? One thing I have noticed is that I definitely won't be letting someone I just met know that I watch wrestling. There are far too many stereotypes that go along with it so I tend to leave that part out.

Super Crazy High Heart

So today I decided to watch movies all day (much like any day). I feel the need to talk about them because they were both pretty good plus I need to wait 27 more minutes so I can finish watching one of the them on megavideo.

First off, Crazy Heart starring Jeff Bridges is a very good film that very much reminds be of The Wrestler in it's style. Sure, Aronofsky's film was a masterpiece so that doesn't quite compare to that but it was still very good with a wonderful performance by Bridges which should win him an Academy Award.

Also decided to watch the film Super High Me after several friends told me I should. So I finally sat down and watched it (most of it) and like it quite a bit. I think every lawmaker in the US should see this movie so they can not be so blind to the laws restricting recreational marijuana use. Bunch of idiots.

Maybe I should go do my Play project for theater...maybe...

Wanting to shut brain off = bad idea

My top 25 list for the year is finally starting to come along so it'll be up within a couple of weeks, possibly days. Now, since I've been trying to catch up on all the greats of the year, it can be tiring since most of those are serious dramas. So in order to counter that I've interspersed some 'no brain' movies.

First up was Sorority Row. Yes, that dumb movie about a Sorority house getting stalked by a deranged killer with a hint of I Know What You Did Last Summer thrown in for good measure. My main reason for watching this was mainly just in order to see hot girls die in entertaining ways. I'm a horror movie fan so it seems like it should be at least fun in that regard. Boy was I wrong. The kills weren't good, the story was dumber than most and I couldn't believe how bad the acting was at times. It's always a bad sign when a bunch of girls try to fake a death for a "prank."

The girls were hot (could have used some more Audrina Partridge though) but the kills were so dumb I just couldn't get into it. They also made one huge mistake by making the least likable girl the heroine. Hell, even "the Bitch" of the Sorority was more likable than her. I just hoped she would die the entire time. But alas, that did not happen. Also, this film has to have the most random "Twist Ending" I've ever seen. Comes completely out of left field and makes very little sense. It seems like most of the screenplay was written and they went "Okay it can't be her, or her or him. So let's make it this guy that's been in two pages." Just plain lazy writing. Thankfully this film didn't do good in theaters so there's shouldn't be any sequels.

Next up was one godawful film. Just plain terrible. I don't think I can warn you enough as to how terrible this film is. And when you look at it you think "Oh this should be fun. It looks to be a fun party movie." That could not be further from the truth. This is truly a shit fest. And this abomination goes by the name of I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell.

Funny title eh? Yeah you're right, it's not. But the complete douchebag who wrote it thought it was so it's no surprise he's just as idiotic as his title. Let me say this, if you ever have a chance to meet Tucker Max (the film's writer and main character of the story) then please punch him in the face. He deserves it. Never has there been such an asshole to grace this planet. By the end of the film, I just wanted to go beat the shit out of this idiot. Move aside dumbass from Narnia, this is now the most hated movie character I know.

Now there aren't many movies I would say this about but if you like this film you are an idiot. It's plain and simple. There's no way to get around it. You have a terrible sense of humor and need to take a hammer to the head. If this film is "relatable" to you then there's no hope for you. You're about as lost as the lead. How someone can go through all of this and not learn his lesson is beyond me. Stupid film. I hated this piece of garbage and don't feel like writing anymore on it.

Fuck Tucker Max.

And so I'm back...

Wow. My first post in 2.5 years. I had actually created this in order to put my reviews up online. Made it somewhat enjoyable. But then I forgot about it. Completely forgot actually. I had moved onto other things and didn't care for it. Then I decided I wanted to get a blog in order to put my thoughts out there, whether it be movies, music, television, video games or just my random thoughts. So I of course came here. And for some reason, when I tried to register it said I had already registered. That didn't exactly make any sense so I looked it up and low and behold there it was. The blog I had created over two years prior. Then I found the two reviews (and my only posts): Grindhouse and Spiderman 3. They weren't too bad either. So that made me all the more excited.

My plan has been to start this revival up with a bang and do my top films of the year. However, there's been a bit of a problem with that. I can't seem to make the list. It's more difficult than I could have imagined. This year was too great for movies. My entire top ten consists of 9's and 10's (out of 10). Some even roll over into 11-20. So how could I make a top ten list when it wouldn't be representative of the films I loved during 2009. So I settled on a Top 25 list. It's still been rather difficult to put them in a desirable order. I just love the films so equally that it's difficult to discern an exact order. But I've been doing my best.

Another problem with my list is that I want to see as many of what people consider to be the "best movies of the year" so that my list can be as close to complete as possible. So I still have some more to go (such as Precious, Brothers, The Road). Even now I am watching The Men Who Stare At Goats. And this film further solidifies my theory that this may be the best year for movies in years upon years. I can definitely call it the best year of the decade, but I may go even further than that. That's how great this year has been.

So hopefully I can get through the remaining films by this weekend so that I'll have a strong opinion on all of the nominees and whoever wins. Hell, why else would I watch a film like Precious?

One thing I'm also looking to do is a list of my own little awards type thing only with out the award or even a winner. Just some nominees for whoever I feel like gave the best performances, had the best cinematography, etc. So I'll probably put those up as well. Well, my food is about here so I'll wrap this up. Hopefully I can keep up with this and continue writing since I don't really have much of an outlet otherwise.

Movie Review: SPIDER-MAN 3

SPIDERMAN 3

Let's just start out by saying that I'm a HUGE Spiderman fan. Ever since I was little when the 90's animated series was on, I would watch and read anything Spiderman. I got plenty of comics and loved everyone of them. I just wish I could have more! Anyway, back to the main point of this review: Spiderman 3. This was one of my most anticipated movies of all time (along with the previous two) but I had confidence in the filmmakers to not disappoint. Did they? Not even a little. Spiderman 3 is one of the most putrid piles of steaming shit I've seen in years. And even THAT's putting it lightly.

There are so many bad things about this movie that I can't help but want to cry thinking about it. The previous two films were so great and just monumental as comic book movies and as movies in general. They had great character development, breathtaking action scenes, well handled drama, subtle humor and damn good acting. Now take ALL of that and completely take it away, add cheesy dialogue, character "underdevelopment", over the top humor, cringe worthy drama, and underwhelming action scenes, and there you have Spiderman 3.

Now first off, is the story. What a jumbled mess. I don't even know if I would consider it a story it's so convoluted and bad. There are so many intersecting storylines that it's really hard to make sense of it all. It jumps from one storyline to another to another and the entire time and left me thinking "What was the point of that?" And trust me, you'll be asking yourself that many times throughout the duration of the film. One subplot that seemed completely useless other than to show off the amazing effects was the Sandman AKA Flint Marko. He was in there to...I mean for...he had this...wait, why in the hell was he in this? What part did he play in the whole scheme of things? Oh wait nothing. The writers (which by the way, should be shot for their stupidity) decided that, in order to add him into the movie, HE was the one that killed Uncle Ben. What a load of shit! That's called the writers being extremely lazy.

Another thing that I felt the writers felt complied to use was the whole New Goblin subplot. It seems like he was just there because the end of the second showed Harry finding his fathers Goblin stash. I was very disappointed in how they handled the character overall. They seemed to just have him in there just to help Peter out in the end. His character would have been a complete waste if not for Franco but I'll get to that later.

The Peter/Mary Jane subplot was just hard to watch. You could tell that they both hated each other (the actors) and it carried over to the characters. Their performances were stale when they were with each other and just uninspired. I disliked MJ's selfishness on her career and her not even realizing how difficult a job being Spiderman is for Peter. I mean, in the end of the second, she was willing to make sacrifices but now suddenly she only cares about herself. Again, this is a case of bad writing.

Probably the only part of the story that I did really like was the Eddie Brock/Venom storyline. Eddie was likable at first, and if I had known nothing about the story or his character in the comics then I would end up thinking he was a good guy. I think this is more credit to Topher Grace than to the writers. When he turned into Venom my heart was racing and I could wait to see what he would do. They didn't show him as much as I would have liked but I still loved every second of celluloid he was in. The look of him was top notch. One thing I didn't like about his character was the fact that when he was Venom he didn't refer to himself as "We" like in the comics but he refers to himself as "I". I really disliked that part and YET AGAIN, that's the writers not knowing what they're doing.

One point of the story that could have been done much better (that my dad also helped the idea along with) was the ending of the film. Instead of how it went down Mary Jane should've been killed by Harry near the middle. Gwen Stacey should've been put in the same predicament as MJ was in the end because Venom has a reason for that: Revenge on both Gwen and Peter. Plus, since half the fans already hate MJ as it is, they could've made the end more dramatic with people worrying about Gwen. But of course, the writers decide to screw it all up, and make a very unclimactic ending.

Looking back on all of the different problems with the storyline and the characters made me think "Did the writers even WATCH the other two films?" "Did they even READ the comics?" I was quite angry at how the characters suddenly had different motives as to what they had in the other films. And the new characters either had motives to try to make them likable (the Sandman being a criminal to get money for his terminally ill daughter) which just showed that the writers can develop characters properly. Or the new ones were completely underused (Gwen Stacey was in it for a total of five minutes and she could have been a great character.)

Now onto the acting. Usually the Spiderman films are staples for great acting in an action movie but of course this one fails to impress. Tobey Mcguire even fails to deliver a great performance which he does in the others. I was quite disappointed in that fact. Kirsten Dunst, as usual, gives a horrible performance and the bad expressions made me annoyed beyond belief. James Franco gives a tremendous performance. He balances out the two different Harry's he must play: The mean "goblin" Harry and the nice amnesiac Harry. I liked both though the darker one this time around was great to watch, though I must say I definitely liked seeing Harry as a nice guy again. J.K. Simmons again hits it out of the park as J. Jonah Jameson but honestly who would have thought other wise.

As for the newcomers, Thomas Hayden Church does a tremendous job with the little that he is given as the Sandman. I really appreciated how much depth he tried to add to the character but not much can be done to a character who is so contradictory in his actions that it's hard to even be plausible. Next comes my favorite performance which surprisingly comes from Topher Grace. He gives a very believable performance as the desperate photographer Eddie Brock. His turn as Venom is menacing and I loved every minute of it. The voice should have been altered a little but it was still damn good. Bryce Dallas Howard does such a good job as the small role as Gwen Stacey. I loved her but honestly, who couldn't?

Onto the effects. I knew going into this that the film would have top notch effects that would make any fanboy cream his pants. Was I right? Most of the time. There were some shots where it looked a little iffy but most of the time it was believable. The sand effects were great and I particularly loved the transformation scene where he's falling apart. Very well done. Every scene with Venom looked great and he was definitely the best villain of the series. I just wish they would have focused the whole movie on his character rather than having three villains. Oh well, there's always the fourth.

One thing that bothered me throughout the entire film was the music. It just didn't fit. It made the whole film make less of an impact. I really think Christopher Young shouldn't get another job after this. He made certain dramatic scenes completely corny because he put in atrocious music. And then, with action scenes, the score just didn't fit at all. In the other two films, the score added depth to the action bits, but in this it took away from it. It sort of ruined a lot of the experiences and I really hope Elfman feels bad for leaving after having to listen to this other guys horrid music.

Something else that was certainly not very well done was the out of place humor. There were way too many added bits that just didn't fit well with the film as a whole. Peter strutting down the street after being attached to the symbiote and shaking his hips at hot girls as they passed. It felt like a scene from a disco movie, not Spiderman. Another scene was the bar room dance scene which was so cringe worthy that I looked away at one point. I wanted to just walk out at that point. Another part was the random shots of the newswoman and the crowd during the intense battle with Venom. I mean Jesus Christ. That was completely unnecessary. Same with Jameson buying the camera off the girl. Completely pointless.

The directing in this film was...well it hurts me to say bad things about Sam Raimi but I've got to say, he dropped the ball on this one. He had stylish shots and such but he's also responsible for the whole look of the film overall. And I must say that he failed to execute. I mean did he realize that he would actually need to EXPLAIN the whole symbiote thing. He didn't explain how Brock knew everything about Peter and knew exactly where to find Mary Jane. That's a combination of bad writing, which this film has plenty of, and a poor job on Raimi's part. Now another thing which I would like to address before wrapping this up would be the atmosphere of the film. The trailers showed this great dark dramatic film that would be a film of epic proportions. The movie itself was campy, light, over the top and just not very good. It was poorly written, badly acted, horribly scored, and just a bad time. What a disappointment...

4/10

Movie Review: GRINDHOUSE


















Grindhouse

One movie that definitely seems to be another victim of "overhype". Now, I'm not saying that this film wasn't amazing but it was definitely a step below what it should have been...a masterpiece. It didn't execute in many places where it should have. Now, I know all about how Quentin was the one who came up with this idea and that just disappoints me more. Later you'll find out why...

Planet Terror

Now if the entire film had brought to the table what Planet Terror had done, then this would've been the best movie in years. But alas, things didn't go the right route. Rodriguez definitely knows what he's doing and he shows it here with stylish camera angles, tremendous action, over the top gore, nudity, and Freddy Rodriguez kicking all kinds of zombie ass.

Going into it, you can definitely tell that this is a Robert Rodriguez flick. The certain tone and atmosphere he sets up in all of his films is well established here within the first twenty seconds of celluloid. We see Rose McGowen give a genuine striptease which if you are a male with a pulse, then you will love it. The names in this are classic too. There's Cherry, El Wray, and my favorite The Rapist.

The gore in this is so over the top, that when a person gets shot in the arm, a pint of blood sprays out. I kid you not. The violence here is so plentiful that, if you're like me, you'll be salivating at the mouth. We get heads chopped off, balls ripped off, nasty gunshot wounds, melting genitalia, bubbling faces, and one hell of a great decapitation due to a gunshot.

And for you males out there we get some great shot of Stacey Furgeson bending over doing here thing while she shows off ample cleavage, and well, everything else that that girl has. Rose McGowen struts around with not only a machine gun leg, but also a nice little skimpy outfit. Like I mentioned earlier, McGowen does a striptease not do be missed.

One thing that makes this film so great are the wonderful performances given by each member of the cast. There is not one poor performance in this segment of the film. Freddy Rodriguez does a stand up job and I'm quite happy to say that he's one of my new favorite actors. Rose McGowen takes home my award for Best Actress in this flick because she portrays everything with such realism that you can't help but relate to her character. Out of the many small roles in this film my favorite would have to be Naveen Andrews. He does a phenomenal job and I wish I could get more of him.

The gritty look of the real "grindhouse" films are in full swing with the film scratched up, burnt, dust particles covering it, and the classic "missing reel" bit. Even if you weren't alive in this era, the look will take you back to good ol exploitation films. I was also lucky enough to view this in a small theater with very few people scattered throughout, so the illusion was full swing.

This is definitely my favorite of the two segments and one of the best times I've had at the theater. This film has all that I want in a movie including gore, babes, action, and subtle humor. I laughed, I cringed, I screamed (on the inside), and I fucking loved every minute of it.

9/10

Death Proof
Now onto the lesser of the two segments, Mr. Tarantino's little bit known as "Death Proof". Talk about a pretentious movie. The first fourty or so minutes are nothing but some annoying characters (Ladd, Ferlito, Poitier) yacking about getting pot, and this girls radio show. It's some of the most mundane, uninteresting, and just plain stupid dialogue. The second group of girls is a little better (Winstead, Dawson, Bell) but their dialogue is still dumb and...dumb. I do like them more since it has Winstead who, if you know me, you know my obsession.

Now, this film isn't all just dumb characters, and horrible dialogue, there are some tremendous car chase sequences. The first being a small bit where a car crashes into another causing many different shots of absolute carnage. As a gore fan I loved it, but it didn't touch on the stuff in "Planet Terror". Next came the best car chase shown on film. There has never been anything like this before and there never will be. The final car chase is a shining example of how Tarantino's isn't a complete waste of space. Zoe Bell does great work here, doing absolutely death defying stunts. The camera work is ridiculously good, making it go in places where I never would have thought possible.

One thing that Tarantino definitely dropped the ball on was the look of the film. Like "Planet Terror" this was supposed to have dust, scratches and burns but in most of the film, the picture with clear and crisp. With the exception of a 'missing reel' bit which came out of nowhere, there was barely anything to make it look like a 60's or 70's movie like it was supposed to. It looked like something that came out this year. Talk about being too full of himself.

The acting is absolutely atrocious in parts which makes me wonder why the hell people would cast these morons. Of the first group of girls, the only one with an ounce of talent is Vanessa Ferlito who always delivers great performances even in the smallest roles. The rest are a complete waste of space. Ladd gives a cute but flimsy performance but doesn't have much to do or to work with. I already know how she got the role though, a little friend called Eli Roth. And anyone that says that Sydney Tamiia Poitier can act has to answer to me because she's one of the worst actresses I've seen. She doesn't have one millionth of the talent of her father.

Now, the second group of girls isn't nearly as bad. Rosario Dawson gives good performance though she doesn't have that much to work with (which I am VERY disappointed in Tarantino for not having good characters). Tracie Thoms does the impossible by becoming one of the most annoying characters in the history of film. Her vocabulary doesn't span much further than 'fuck' and dozens of racial jokes. She also manages to be one of the dumbest characters (hmm...how about you STOP when someones trying to kill you with a fucking car!) She's atrocious in every part of the movie she's in. As much as I hate to say it, Mary Elizabeth Winstead is pretty bad in this. I'll admit it even though I'm crazy about her but she didn't do good. Then again she also had nothing to work with whatsoever. Nothing but horrible lines were given to her and her character was just a no brain "actress". The definite standout was Zoe Bell. She took on the role like a pro and handled it extremely well. Sure, she was playing herself but put in front of a camera, the most real people can look like idiots. Her action bits were absolutely off the wall with insane stunts which she did tremendously.

The best performance in this film (with Zoe following right behind) was of course Kurt Russell. He went back into his "Escape" days and brought insanity back to the screen in a great way. He managed to be absolutely sick and sadistic but so likable. When the third act came, you just wanted him to kill the girls and get his jollies off. His look in the camera bit was priceless and had me laughing my ass off.

Though this is a definite plus for the movie the bad definitely outweighs the good. The horrible dialogue, unlikable characters, and slow pace beat out the amazing car chase sequence unfortunately. Let's hope that Tarantino knows what to do and what not to do with his next film but with my luck, he'll think he's a god again and loose sight of what he's really supposed to do.

4/10

The Fake Trailers
Thanksgiving
This was definitely my favorite of all of the fake trailers made for the film. It had all the basic elements of a great slasher. The out of nowhere and peculiar gore and the great corny dialogue meant to pay homage to all of the great slashers of that age. I particularly loved the trampoline bit. Absolutely legendary! I can't to see the uncut version of that! I loved it every time the narrator would say "Thanksgiving" in a low, monotone voice. Priceless. Roth certainly has some talent and it shows by this trailer. Let's hope he makes movies that are as good as this trailer.

9/10

Machete
Rodriguez directed this great trailer about a hitman out for revenge. The over the top voice over was great, the gore was funny, and Danny Trejo shows just how much of a badass he is. The random scene with him and the two naked girls in the waterfall was just great and had me laughing like no other. I can only hope that Rodriguez is able to make this into an actual movie.

9/10

Don't
Edgar Wright spoofs pretty much everything you can spoof in this crazy trailer. Is it a ghost, slasher, cannibal, or demon movie? I guess only Wright knows for sure but I know I loved it for what it was, a great little spoof of everything I love. Great cameos from Nick Frost and Jeremy Irons make this all the better.

8/10

Werewolf Women of the S.S.
Zombies trailer was definitely the weakest of the four. It had some funny little moments (Nic Cage's cameo was priceless. It also had Sheri Moon Zombie looking gorgeous but when doesn't she? The idea was intriguing but this was just poorly executed. It tried to be too hip and cool and it just failed completely.

5/10

Overall the experience was fun and enjoyable. Death Proof definitely brought everything down with it's horrible dialogue and characters but Planet Terror brought it up with it's tremendous characters, great dialogue, and gore off the whazzoo! Go see this movie now and you won't regret it...too much.

8/10

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