Rob Zombie's Halloween (2007)
It still amazes me just how bad this movie is. It takes everything that worked in the Carpenter original and screws it all up. Like the mystery of Michael as a character? Well guess what, now he's a part of a despicable family, that all seem pretty deserving of their deaths. Don't believe me? Watch the first scene with the family in the kitchen, and count the number of times you want to kill everyone involved. It will reach a hundred before the scene is over.
Young Michael is just god awful. I'm not sure what made Zombie want to cast some blonde kid that looks like a girl in the role, but it clearly wasn't for his presence or acting ability. Whenever he puts on his "scary face" I just laugh and laugh. I mean, how did he seriously get cast in a big hollywood film like this? Just blows my mind.
One thing I'll give this film is that Masked Michael is pretty terrifying. Outside of the first two films, Michael can look pretty silly. Just watch H20 and Resurrection and see how awkward the stunt actor moves. It's not pretty. Tyler Mane does a good job of bringing the scary back to Michael. He's a brute force that is on a path of destruction. Unfortunately, the film he's in is just so bad that it's hard to even believe it's real and not just a bad, bad, BAD dream.
Seriously Zombie, what were you smoking?